Ahhhh the swinger community. Part of the community or not, you gotta love em. We had the privilage of being invited to Group Sensuals launch event on New Years by founders Missie and Tony. They are the brand new swingers group in town, and it looks like not only are they here to stay…but are here to dominate.

Group Sensual was founded by 2 swingers, but is maintained by numerous pillars of the swinging community. Many other groups claim it, but Group Sensual is actually doing it…the first swingers group, by swingers, for swingers. What we are impressed with is not only the cost of the events (or lack thereof sometimes!) but how well put together they are. We showed up at the hall, and to our suprise there were less than 10 cars in the parking lot. We was a little confused at first, but then remembered that they had a limo shuttling people back and forth from the hotel. What a setup!

We were greeted in the entrance by a very friendly sharply dressed couple, which explained the lay of the land as it pertained to the building etc. We went in, got checked in, which also to our suprise was a very quick efficient process. The draw for the night was about 400 people or so. Great turnout considering the other 2 main swinger groups were also throwing parties on New Years parties that night (from what we hear their turnout was not nearly that of Group Sensuals.)

Of course, as soon as we got in the actual hall we bee lined for the bar. We figure what better way to keep your liver in shape than by working it out. Anyways, very friendly bar tender, good stiff drinks and well priced.

Next it was on to find a table and hang out a bit. We were surrounded by good looking, well dressed, and extremely friendly people. The hall was decorated very nicely, and music was blaring so it was a great chance to talk and meet some people. After numerous conversations (and even more drinks) it was time to eat. The spread was great! Good selection, freshly prepared, and well presented.

What I was especially impressed with, was the cross section of people that turned out. There was people of all ages, shapes, sizes, colors, and interests. Overall, Great food, Great people, Great price, Great location, Great Music, and an all around Great time.

For upcoming events and more information on Group Sensual, Minneapolis, MN ’s newest swinger group, stop by Midwest Triple X, or visit Group Sensual’s website at http://www.groupsensual.com .

Some Thoughts for the Dominant, according to Wolf

A man once asked Mozart how to write a symphony. Mozart told him to study at the conservatory for six or eight years, then apprentice with a composer for four or five more years, then begin writing a few sonatas, pieces for string quartets, piano concertos, etc. and in another four or five years he would be ready to try a full symphony. The man said, “But, Mozart, didn’t your write a symphony at age eight?” Mozart replied, “Yes, but I didn’t have to ask how.” ::Smile:: Quite a quote and one you may hear from a Dominant, Yes we are born this way, but we all have to start somewhere, learning is the most important skill for a Dominant without it we fail to be a “Good” Dominant.

So what is a Good Dominant?
(What follows is my opinion and in no way states that Mine is the only path to follow, there are many differing opinions out there and I suggest you seek them all. I use the male pronoun as I am MALE though a Dom or Domme is male or female.)

What should a Dominant be?
(The question can only be answered individually, by both submissive and Dominants alike. But here is my rendition of what a Dominant should strive to be.)

The Dominant should be in control of Himself first and foremost, He is confident, caring, and understanding, He does not allow ego to get in the way of learning, both about Himself and his submissive, He knows how to love, and how to cherish the gift given to Him.

When the Dominant meets a new submissive He is kind and guiding without demanding ritual of her, He does not demand respect, He earns it, He explores her mind first, learning her strengths, He does not seek to seduce her , but gets to know her as a person first, building a relationship, slowly discovering if there is to be one.

If He is a good Dominant, He does not do this to gain another submissive, but only because He is able to befriend someone, without the trappings of sexuality, He is not a predator, but a teacher, willing to pass His knowledge with little or no reward, but the pleasure of knowing He can, and the satisfaction of helping someone define their own path.

If the time comes when she offers herself to His service, the Dominant is the first to question her decision, to ask her to look into herself and discover if He is what she really wants. He is the first to mention Safety, to volunteer references, and to tell her to seek more. He supports safe calls and public meetings first, her safety is foremost in His mind at this beginning. If He decides to take the submissive into service, He is the first to mention negotiation, to offer his own personal information. He realizes the danger
she could be in if placed in the wrong hands, and seeks to guide her in protecting herself, He does not dismiss her worries, for He knows her risks are all to real.

He knows His safety also depends on honesty & communication. He is at first only as protective of Himself He needs to need be, but open and honest about His life, His tastes, what He expects. He knows that she will be taking a leap of faith, and is supportive of her.

To possess her He Knows He must first earn her respect, to do this He must prove He is what He says he is, that He cares for her, that He would push her limits only to build her strengths, that He is willing to spend the time to learn her as a person first, then as a submissive. He knows how wonderful this gift is that she offers, and is willing to live up to her trust in Him. To this end, He talks with her, learning her secret needs and desires, and in turn expressing His own, always ready to affirm her worth, to Him, and to herself, increasing her confidence in herself, and in the gift she gives, gently pushing her limits to show her she can be more than she feels she is, that she can go farther than she ever thought possible, Slowly opening the flower of her submission, coaxing her passion for Him into full bloom.

If she lacks self esteem He shows her He respects her and finds her worthy of His time. He shows her she has beauty in His eyes, thus she is beautiful. He focuses on her strengths, to show her of her own power. He softly explains that the gift she gives is the most wonderful gift of all, herself. He takes the time to learn her soul, before thinking of learning her body, as the Dominant learns his new submissive, a connection takes place allowing Him to sense her desires, her needs, her passions. With this new knowledge, the
Dominant is able to take his submissive to new heights of pleasure, to guide her and walk with her as together they seek new levels of love and fulfillment.

In taking a submissive into His service the Dominant takes on many responsibilities. He pledges to help guide her in her path, not only in the bedroom, but in life. He pledges to be there for her when she needs Him, to care for her, ease her pain when she is depressed, comfort her when she is ill, assist her in overcoming her fears and worries, to hold and love her when she needs affection. He does this because He can, for this is His gift to her… Her gift given willingly, His returned with joy, He seeks to understand her mind, to gaze into her soul, because only then can the two become more than each can be as they are as individuals. She is His most precious possession and He strives to prove His love, much the way she will, every day.

The Dominant does not seek to change His submissive into what He wants, but revels in the chance to show her what she can become. He enjoys showing her those strengths she already possesses, and simply guides her, helping her to grow into the person she wishes to be. He coaxes her into finding her own path, but never states outright what that path should be. Once found, He will keep her to her task, gently pushing her to become the woman He knows she can be.

Is there a profile of the perfect Dominant?
I think not — perfection is something we all strive to obtain, but never reach. It is the struggle to find perfection that makes a good Dominant. There is no one description of a good Dominant; just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, no viewpoint is wrong, merely different. All that can be said is that a good Dominant should have the good qualities that include strength, ability, confidence, control, the ability to learn and the presence of mind to know that He can always learn more. He should be, loving, encouraging, honorable and chivalrous, He should respect and cherish women and show the respect to others that He himself wishes to be shown.

The Dominant should be sure of Himself, and in that confidence not think that to build himself He must look down at others. He should be sure of His ideals, but not so sure that His way is the only path. He can allow others to follow their own paths, no matter how different, without ridicule. If He witnesses a wrong he seeks to right it, but without pressing the view that His way is the only one, only expressing the danger of another’s action or offering His assistance to help guide them out of danger.

He knows the difference between punishment and play, between pain and sensation. He never exerts His power in anger, He never brings anger and hostility into a scene. He does not use this gift to vent His anger, but leaves outside concerns outside. He knows that to control others He must first master Himself.

He can exercise His art to help His submissive become the woman she has always been, deep within her spirit. He takes her gift of submission seriously, knowing that it is not given blindly or lightly. He always remembers how precious the gift is, how rare it is, how beautiful it is. For she has given him something that cannot be taken, but must be given, the gift of herself, her soul, and the Dominant should cherish that gift as the rare jewel it is.

The submissive should be firm in her femininity. She offers herself to the Dominant freely, of her own choosing. She gives the gift of her submission in exchange for His love, care, knowledge and protection. She obeys because she chooses to, not because she is forced to. She comes to Him a woman, but unsure of her role, seeking His guidance, and is quick learn what is expected of her. With this learning, and as He opens Himself to her, she begins to give more of herself, of her soul, her secrets, until all the two can share is learned, building their relationship, sharing their secrets and souls, so they may walk this path together.

There is no power lost, no control wrested from her, she gives willingly, the Dominant giving of Himself until an immense measure of trust is built between the two. The sub must trust her Dominant completely in order to give so much of herself to Him, and, the Dominant must trust the sub in order for Him to accept her and her gift.

“Training” (just another word for teaching) is only the process of learning what the Dominant desires. The sub must learn when to kneel, how to sit to please her Dominant, how to address her Dominant, and so on. She does these things because she wishes to, her wish is to please her Dominant in all ways possible. Even the most “bratty” submissive comes to know just what is expected of her and what her Dominant’s limits are.

It is said that the Dominant holds all of the control, and in some ways He does, but this is a consensual relationship. The Dominant holds control, but only as far as the Submissive is willing to go. He may push her limits for the pleasure of both. However, the Submissive can walk away at anytime, hard as that may be, if the Dominant loses sight of her needs. It is said that the submissive has no responsibilities, but a deeper observation shows otherwise. It has been said by many, that the Dominant holds all the responsibilities; however, many of the submissive’s responsibilities are so subtle as to be overlooked. She must please her Dominant, she must act as He would wish, as her every action reflects on her Dominant. She must uphold His honor, as He must uphold hers while protecting her. She must have faith and trust in her Dominant, just as He must prove her trust well founded. She needs the strength of will to know when her Dominant is acting in her best interests, and be willing, without embarrassment, to do as He asks her within her limits. Because that is what her Dominant wants and what she wishes; to please Him she would do that which seems difficult and even embarrassing at the time. She must not follow blindly, but see that what her Dominant asks of her is for the pleasure of them both.

At times the Dominant may understand that the sub can go farther that she thought, and with the use of safe words, He is able to take her there. For the beginning of all relationships it is most important to abide by the perceived limits, it must be taken slowly. If a safe word is used and the Dominant does not heed the submissive’s perceived limit, then an important trust is broken. The use of safe words should be stressed in any new relationship so that the trust and understanding are able to grow. With time and understanding, however, the two can reach a point where the Dominant knows how far the submissive can go physically, emotionally, and spiritually and the submissive can come to trust her Dominant’s decisions. Even then a safe word is still an important safety net. It can be dropped in session, but a worthy Dominant still holds the value of using safe words in new and uncharted territory, even in a long standing and trusting relationship. The caring Dominant knows He cannot read minds, even if He knows His
submissive extremely well.

The submissive has a wonderful role to live with the right Dominant. With Him, she will grow emotionally and spiritually into what she wishes to become, learn to love freely and unconditionally and find the true power deep within her. The Dominant also becomes the man He feels within his soul, proud to be able to walk the honorable path of Teacher, Poet, Warrior and Protector. Proud of His charge and the pleasure they bring each other. Together the two will embark on a journey that will take them out of the realms and limits of society and into the timeless dimensions of the Universe.

Thanks to Wolf at Shadow Academy for all of his amazing work within the community and for permission to use this write up of his. His floggers are available at Midwest Triple X, if you would like to check out his information feel free to visit http://www.shadowacademy.com .

Simply put, cock rings are cooler than almost anything else in the history of the world ever. A brief backround…

Cock rings (c-rings, or cock and ball rings) are rings that fit on a man’s penis. They usually are placed at the base of the penis, but may also be worn around the penis and scrotum, just the scrotum, or other areas of the shaft as well. They are most commonly constructed of rubber, silicone, leather, or metals.

Cock rings purpose are to slow the escape of blood from an erect penis. This means maintaining an erection for a longer period of time, an increase in size, as well as heightened sensations during oragasm. For this reason, cock rings may be used as an aid to prevent erectile dysfunction, or simply for a new sensation. Cock rings may also be worn simply as jewelry.

Types of cock rings

Stretchy Materials - Stretchy materials are generally applied when the penis is flacid (soft), but some may also be applied when already aroused. They may be silicone, nylon, or rubber most commonly. Many variations of these kind of cock rings exist. Many even vibrate. Some are able to simply cinch to size, these are known as a rubber hog tie. Some include clitoral stimulators, anal stimlators, or both. They may include a ring for the cock and balls, as well as one for just the shaft. There are also variations that may include 5 or 6 rings, referred to as the gates of hell.

Leather - Leather cock rings generally have a break in the material for connecting. They may have studs on the outside of the ring simply for fashion, or for added stimulation. Some cock rings have buckles, some snap, and others just stretch.

Metal Cock Rings - Metal Cock Rings may be made out of Stainless Steel, Chrome, or Titanium. Some of these cock rings have a break in them, with a hinge and a nut so you may take them off while erect if need be. Most however are a solid ring. The general sizing on a cock ring varies from 1.5 inches to 2.25 inches, however custom made rings are available. Like the other materials cock rings are made out of, metal cock rings come in various shapes and sizes.

Wrap up and sizing

Cock rings are a must if you’ve never tried one, or if you have erectile dysfunction. We suggest starting with a rubber or a silicone ring to get the feel of it. When you’re ready step up to a stainless or a chrome ring. We suggest chrome, as it is affordable, and doesn’t have the risk of irritation like stainless steel can. In terms of sizing, you may either wrap a string around your scrotum and penis, or simply start big and work your way smaller. If you ever experience ANY pain with a cock ring, STOP what you’re doing and remove the ring when possible. If this occurs with a chrome cock ring simply step up your sizing 1 notch.

November 9th, after much turmoil we are finally open! Midwest Triple X is located at 207 Washington Ave. North in Minneapolis. We are 1/2 block west of Sexworld on the Northeast corner of 2nd and Washington. We love Minneapolis!

We believe we are the only 100% employee owned (Co-Op?!) in Minnesota, possibly the US. If anyone has and info for us on this let us know!

Anyways, long road to get here. The owner of the former shop in this location (Robert Weisberg) was the guy who drove Shinders into the ground. We were actually employees of his at one point. The owners of Midwest Triple X worked at Adult Only Superstore.  Needless to say we ran into some hard times and issues in regards to the former store (mainly with payroll disappearing etc.) We all walked out due to lack of pay, once the former owner and store were evicted we picked the lease back up, remodeled (fluorescent lights suck!), restocked, and decided to go an entirely different direction.

We realized that most shops around here relied off flashy lights, high price points (even for mostly used product), free popcorn, and a churning customer base to stay open. We run off the BASIC principles that there is NEVER a need to do business at the expense of your customers or employees. After all, customers and employees are the biggest asset to a business! There is a right way and a wrong way to do things, and we are here to do things right!

Our shop specializes in straight, gay, and everything in between in terms of both Toys, DVD’s, and other goods. We do alot of work with local artisians and the community to offer the best Minnesota crafted goods, at the best possible price. We also will special order hard to find DVD’s, and do it no money down! We love custom orders as well on leather, suede, paddles, floggers, and sex machines! If your serious about play, you have a home here! Anyone who tells you that you can’t stimulate the economy by stimulating yourself is full of it!

Shinders and AOS provided a great service, and will be missed by anyone who has bought porno or pogs from em. Thank you to Matt McKinney with the star Tribune for providing such great coverage of the Shinder’s last run debacle. To Joel Shinder, thank you for the 91-3 years of services your store provided, we’re sorry that your family’s legacy was screwed over by a couple of bad seeds.